Tag Archives: renewed faith

Thirsty for More

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Millennium Park, Chicago, IL 2009

As the deer pants for the water brooks,
So pants my soul for You, O God.
My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.

– Psalm 42:1-2a

After observing Holy Communion yesterday I watched one of my young Sunday School students licking the last drop of grape juice from the bottom of the tiny juice cup. She is not baptized yet, and therefore is not served Holy Communion, so I’m sure it seemed quite special to her to try to get the last drop of this holy juice. I looked down at her struggling to reach her tongue to the very bottom. She looked up at me with big brown eyes, smiling as she slurped it completely dry.

As I saw this smiling innocent child I thought, ‘Why don’t I thirst for God like that?’ A child experiences things with more brilliance, more excitement than an adult because they have not experienced as much hardship, heartbreak, and failure. Oh, to return to that innocence would be so delightful, to experience God’s goodness for the first tasty time. We cannot concentrate on what is no longer. I may not have the innocence I had when I was Annie’s age, but God gives me His Holy Spirit, which causes my soul to thirst for more of his goodness and love. That thirst returned that morning even for a moment, for a day when I saw the youngest members of our congregation hopping and clapping to worship music, young and old in celebration together. It’s the kind of joy and thirst that only comes from the cup that overflows, the love of Christ.

Let us pray:

Heavenly Father, I want to want you more. I do not always recognize my hunger for you when I go through my daily activities, but it’s always there. Bring it to the forefront, that I might thirst for you day and night, never being satisfied but wanting more. Thank you Lord that you sent your Holy Spirit down to fill me, that I may experience your joy and want more of you. Make my soul to crave your goodness so much that I would be willing to reach for every last drop of your unending love. Amen.

 

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My Testimony – Part 1

As you may have read in “The Author” page, I have been in the church since I was about 7 years old. Though I have attended church for the past 25 years, my road has not been straight. As the Rascal Flatts song goes “God blessed the broken road.” Though I did not walk on a straight path, God was always with me and in the hardest of times I found that He was the only constant, my loyal partner and guide. It’s hard to admit you are wrong, to accept His grace and mercy, but when we enter into a place of humility we can fully experience the depth and width of His love. 

Always an innocent and a late bloomer, college hit me like a ton of lead. If you throw a ton of lead onto a paper boat what do you think happens? That’s kind of what happened to me, but as I was sinking I always looked up through the layers of heavy water to the one thing I knew was true. Temptations and peer pressure sunk this paper boat, but at the floor of this ocean people gathered around me to push me back up to the surface. A great mentor, Kim Davis, who I showed little to no appreciation to at the time kept me from scraping my hull on the ocean floor. And as she exited another Kim and her husband Michael entered giving me the most non-judgmental encouragement possible. This refining process was not an overnight job. It took many years, many miracles, and many people to bring this boat to the surface. 

Now that I am back afloat God is strengthening this paper boat through His Word, His children, and prayer. God knows I have a long way to go, but he uses this paper vessel everyday, if I allow it, to speak life and truth into others. Who knows? Maybe one day this soggy paper will be a giant barge for Jesus.